On reflection I wonder if my family's beliefs that academic intelligence and education are actually damaging. I've grown up feeling not good enough or feeling superior at times, both ugly experiences.
As I watched my son - his simplicity is so beautiful and I wonder why we spend life making everything so complicated? As if by building this bank of false beliefs about what we need and should or shouldn't do we're somehow successful or important? I've been running around thinking I have to do this, decide where we'll live, when we'll go, how we'll sell the house and what to do because we cannot afford it. I've created so much stress and pain and yet our situation remains the same.
I definitely need to watch my son and baby girls - let them guide me, teach me how to be in the here and now.
Favourite child magic moment of the week: we went for a walk and our son kept walking ahead, he'd scrutinise a stick, murmur to himself, drop it and find another. After a while he turned around and said "none of these have my name on? Where is my stick?". It took me a while to realise when we got there my husband had said "bet there is a big stick here with your name on it!"